two years ...

December 11, 2009


I sat at this very moment in my living room with my friend Larissa and her brother.  They had come over to pick up some clothes Abram had out grown. It was really cold outside and I didn't feel like cooking.  My in-laws were on their way into town to help us fix up the laundry/mud room. Just after Rissa and Lee left I called Bradley to let him know I had called in WingStop and see if he would pick it up on his way home. All was well. Barrett, Abram, and I were playing in the living room floor, waiting for Bradley to come home with dinner.  At 5:50 my phone rang, it was the call that changed everything. My mom was on the phone and she was upset.  All she could say was your dad has been hit by a truck.  I don't know how bad it is, just meet me at the hospital. I could hardly breathe. I calmly told her it would be okay and I would meet her there as soon as possible. I hung up and got shoes on while I called Bradley to let him know he needed to get here as soon as he could. These moments are forever burned in my mind.  Barrett's sweet face asking me why I was crying. Wanting to know what was going on.  I told him Papa was hurt, but we didn't know how bad and I had to leave for the hospital.  Barrett, who was just learning the responsibilities of being a big brother said, "But Mom, when you leave who will change Abram's diapers?! I can't do that by myself yet!" I reassured him his daddy would be there with him. I passed Bradley in the doorway and rushed off. I called my best friends to let them know we really, really needed prayers. We did not know what hospital they were taking him to, so my first stop was BSA. He wasn't there. I hurried next door to NorthWest. The ambulance had just arrived, they didn't have a name or any information. I told them what I could, until my mom arrived. Shortly there after Matt and Andrew showed up. My stomach was in knots. We had asked to see him and we kept getting "They are cleaning him up, it will be a little while." As soon as the triage nurse offered us a "family room" I knew. Things were not going well. We were trying frantically to get a hold of my sister. Finally she made it to the hospital. As the hours passed, we had several visits from the police officers, updating us on suspects and information. A surgeon came in and told us they were doing everything they could "but it would be a miracle if he made it through the night". They took us upstairs to a waiting area outside the Special Procedures lab where they were working on my dad. I went back with my mom and we could see him on the table lying there with TONS of people around him. One face looked up, and it was my childhood friend, Tiffany.  I was so happy to see someone I knew, someone that would take care of him as if he were her own dad. My mom and I prayed and prayed in that hallway.  I sat in the floor listening to them call out as they pushed Epinephrine, timing the minutes until they could push another dose, listening to the heart monitor beep s.l.o.w.l.y., then stop, then beat again, then stop. I knew too much, I was timing everything. Then the nurse came out and said, they had done all they could... those words felt like a knife. They literally took my breath away. He couldn't really be gone. He was the "big-bad-dad". He was the toughest guy I knew. As my mother talked with the doctors and nurses I walked toward the waiting area where the rest of our family was. I will never forget a second of that day, the look on my brothers face after he looked at mine. Watching him angry and sad fall to the floor. Knowing there was nothing I could do. The last time I saw my dad, he lay on that table, bruised and battered. I kissed him on top of the head, like he had done to me so many times before. Until we meet again, we miss you Nelson Ray Bridges, II. 

Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)"

Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I'm found
Was blind, but now I see
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed
My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy rains
Unending love, Amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me
His word my hope secures
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures

[2x]
My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy rains
Unending love, Amazing grace

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow
The sun forbear to shine
But God, Who called me here below
Will be forever mine
Will be forever mine
You are forever mine